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Emily-Jane Hillman: ‘Health Warning: Only Revisit the Past Through Art’

Audio Description

There are 3 pieces of art that form a visual narrative of the process of healing from mental, physical and emotional trauma to rebirth and renewal through the artistic process.

1. A 15 inch square canvas painted flesh coloured red and that has been slashed horizontally numerous times. Through the gaps tea stained nappy liners that suggest layers of skin protrude slightly here and there with the word ‘received’ stamped on them in blood red. Elsewhere empty mental health medication packets protrude through all the slashes. There are lots of them jumbled and stuffed through the slashes.

2. A 15 inch square pink painted box that is 3 inches deep and has a glass face framed by the pink painted wood. A rope pattern protruding from the wood with a marks a border between the glass and the frame. Inside the box has a soft backing that is covered with tea soaked nappy liners reminiscent of skin. The word ‘paid’ is stamped all over the liners. On top of this, lying at the centre of the box are two red rubber covered spoons whose round parts face outwards. These depict ovaries. Attached is a red and blue rubber covered fabric uterus. Chains soaked in multi coloured paint reminiscent of tubes and visceral parts of the body surround the sculptured uterus and ovaries.

3. A wooden board 14×16 inches that has been covered with poetry that has been written in burgundy fabric markers onto scraps of cotton fabric soaked in tea. The text covers the board. On top of this and mostly obscuring the text, are further tea stained nappy liners reminiscent of layers of skin. On top of . the liners, a number of eyes and lips and mouths have been drawn in coloured fabric markers onto scraps of cotton fabric. The marks have a plastic like effect. Further liners are layered on top through which scraps of antique letters protrude. At the corners and partially obscured, several dates can be seen several inches high 1975, 1996, 2009, 2011, 2013. A goats head partially obscured with the word ‘scapegoat’ can also be seen slightly obscured by the liners ‘skin.’ The words ‘ I can see clearly now the rain has gone,’ and ‘you being the rain’ can be seen at the top right of the artwork.

In my practice I am preoccupied with the female body – the surface of the body and the hidden emotional depths that are covered or unseen. 2018 was a year of death to life for me. That year I had undergone a number of major surgeries due to ovarian cancer, I was also re-experiencing childhood trauma through a family court case, which precipitated a breakdown and necessitated medication. I began to make big sculptural works on wood depicting women who have overcome great odds and gave me the impetus to explore what was going on beneath the surface of my own body and within the recesses of my own mind. The process of exploring these new works and taking control of my own narrative, helped me overcome the physical, mental and emotional trauma that I was experiencing. I have been able to integrate the facets of my identity I have struggled with: abuse and trauma survivor; surviving cancer; the loss of six pregnancies to miscarriage. I have responded to the aldiano theme by showing the process of rebirth I went through in 2018 and how I refashioned these experiences of mental (1), physical (2) and emotional (3) trauma into art.

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